League of Exasperated Elder Siblings
by Triscribe
Summary: One of my Futureverse tales, set in the same timeline as Valentine and The Future Not Remembered. When your parents and mentors are no help in dealing with the frustrations of being an older brother or sister, the only people you can turn to are those in the same predicament.


Reggie Duncan took his helmet and banged it against the table as a makeshift gavel. "Okay, guys, I hereby officially call to order the monthly meeting of the League of Exasperated Elder Siblings."

"I've been meaning to ask, can we change it to the Elder Relatives?" Terry McGinnis asked, going through and cleaning various bits of equipment from his utility belt. "Because while Macy and Matt are bad enough, I've got four more cousins to deal with as well."

"Nooo, we can't risk changing it! Then the Allen twins will be in here complaining about the West ones!" Amistad Ervin whined from the opposite side of the table.

"You're welcome to complain about your other family members, Robin," Hania'elle, their resident Atlantean member offered. "But we want to keep just brothers and sisters in here, lest we risk flooding our numbers with those who would be inclined to talk our ears off about events that may or may not actually fit our criteria."

"In other words, no speedsters!" Everyone nodded along in agreement with Reggie's assessment.

"Well then, does anyone mind if I go first?"

"Nah, fire away Rob - what have the other Bats been getting under your skin with lately?"

The fifteen year old set his gear down with a sigh and absently ran a hand over his face. "They started a prank war in the Bat Cave."

Silence reigned for a few moments as the others all stared at him in shock. While they knew perfectly well that Terry's younger adoptive cousins were perfectly capable of outrageous pranking contests (having experienced being caught in quite a few crossfires over the years), the fact that the youths had instigated such a thing in the heart of their Clan's operation center...

"...Scale of one to ten, how badly did the older guys chew them out?" Amistad asked tentatively.

Terry responded with a groan. "They didn't. My aunts and uncles joined in, Dick leading the charge. It turned into more of a prank battle of adults versus kids."

Reggie let out a low whistle of awe while Hania and Amis wore similar expressions of shock. "And here I thought fighting those people in a typical spar was terrifying enough! I can't imagine what it would look like to see the pink glitter and rubber chickens flying."

"And you wouldn't want to." Terry muttered darkly. "I barely got out of there unscathed. The only ones who _didn't_ participate were Selina, who was coming back from that trip to New York, Alfred, who was driving her, and Bruce, who hid with me in the kitchen upstairs."

Hania surprised them by snickering. "You are saying that Batman, the Dark Knight of Gotham, slayer of parademons and conqueror of Arkham, _hid_ from his own relatives amidst a prank war?"

"You didn't see the things that I did in that cavern, Hani. Bruce only had to listen to my description of it and agreed a tactical retreat was in our best interest." By this point, each of the others had begun to laugh, and even Terry had cracked a smile.

"Okay, okay, hilarious as that is, my question would be: did they all get the pranks out of their systems by the end of it?" Amistad arched an eyebrow at the Gotham teen, only a year older than him.

"Hopefully, yes. At the very least, everybody exhausted their materials supplies for a while, so the rest of us should be in the clear until they restock."

"Oh, good."

"Thank Neptune for that."

"See, Ter, something good came out of your traumatic experience." Reggie tried to pat his friend on the head, only for Terry to cheerfully slap his hand away. "Now, while I don't have anything _that_ noteworthy to complain about, I would like to vent my extreme irritation over Jamal and Samson and something I've come to call the 'Better Parent' syndrome."

"Uh-oh, I think I can tell where this is going."

"Shush, Amis, and let me get the relief from explaining. So, Jamal is like how I was a few years ago, putting together a tech-suit similar to our mom's. Sam, though, insists that Dad is better, since he goes and fights without powers or hi-tech gadgets."

"And since your middle brother is never one to back down from a challenge, he's turned it into a competition with Samson, hasn't he?"

"Yep. Mom and Dad, of course, aren't home and conscious at the same time for long enough to notice, so it's falling to _me_ to try and keep my baby bro's from demolishing the house."

Terry winced in sympathy. "Sheesh. At least with lots of little cousins comes lots of adults to help control them. I don't know how you manage, dude."

"With plenty of patience." Reggie said dryly. "And a massive, hidden stockpile of sweets to bribe them into behaving with."

"Ah, but that's the cheater's way out, isn't it?" Haia questioned him.

"True, but after a decade of those two always getting into brawls with one another, I'm willing to resort to just about anything to put a quick stop to it."

Amistad and Hania exchanged a glance. "We might just have to consider something like that for Tabby." The latter admitted.

Reggie snorted at them. "Please - don't tell me the two of you, here to complain about the _same_ little sister, can't keep her out of trouble without stooping to my methods."

"She flooded the house yesterday." Both the other teens raised their eyebrows as Amistad's admission. "Not on purpose - at least, we don't think so, and she hasn't said as much - but there was enough water to bust out the windows and front and back doors, carrying all sorts of stuff out onto the lawn."

"And as Kaldur was not home at the time, it fell to me to try and sort things out." Hania'elle told them. "You all know as well as I do that my magical talents are rather paltry compared to the others in our home."

"Hey, that still leaves you with an advantage over me and Mom! We didn't have our belts or anything to help out with." Amis was quick to point out to his foster sister.

"Then I guess it's just as well you guys live on a deserted stretch of shoreline, right?" Terry chuckled.

"Right, but that also meant we were scrambling to try and gather up all our stuff before it got floated down to the beach and floated out to sea!"

Several minutes, all four teens were gasping for breath after their long laughter session. The air was so thick with amusement, that when the door opened to reveal the confused face of eleven year old Kara Kent, the lot of them were set off cackling again.

"Ah, heh, sorry, SG, what did you need?" Reggie asked, somehow the first to recover himself.

"Um... You guys are meeting to complain about your younger brothers and sisters, right?"

"Ah," Terry smirked at her. "Something tells me B'nn and Marie have been getting on your nerves lately."

The Kryptonian's shoulders slumped as she groaned. "Yes, they have, and I don't know what to do about it!"

"Well, step one is to get in here and tell us all about it." Amistad stood to show her to an empty seat. "Welcome to the League, by the way."

"Thanks," she said gratefully. "Mom, Dad, Uncle Gar- none of them have been any help with this, whatsoever."

"Well that is why we exasperated elder sibs have to stick together! So, what seems to be the trouble lately?"

"It started with a shape-shifting contest..."


End file.
